


heaven and hell

by nygmobs



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Fix-It, Grief/Mourning, Happy Ending, Love Confessions, M/M, Reunions, castiel is dead (not for long), fix-it basically for the last three episodes, gonna try and fix the sam and eileen thing, no beta we die like men, they deserve better
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:07:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27862050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nygmobs/pseuds/nygmobs
Summary: heaven and hell ain't got nothing on us baby
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester
Kudos: 5





	heaven and hell

**Author's Note:**

> so i lied here’s another fix-it

dean sat there where cas had left him his back pressed against the wall, his face in his hands as he let out quiet sobs.

he doesn't know how long he's been sitting there or how long he's been letting his tears fall to the ground.

after everything that just happened...  
after losing... losing cas... losing his best friend.. his angel.

time just seemed to stop for him. he couldn't comprehend what had just happened to him.. 

cas had told him... told him that he loved him. and then he was just gone. 

cas told dean he loved him. then he was gone.

dean kept replying and replying the same scene in his head.

“because the one thing i want, it's something i know i can't have..”

“but i think i know, i think i know now.. happiness isn't in the having it's in just begin.. it's in just saying it”

“what are you talking about man?”

“i know.. i know how you see yourself, dean..you see yourself the same way our enemies see you, you're destructive, you're angry and you're broke.. you're daddys little blunt instrument and you think that hate and anger that's.. that's what drives you that's who you are, it's not and everyone who knows you sees it everything you have ever done the good and the bad you have done for love you raised your little brother for love you fought for this whole world for love that is who you are, you are the most caring man on earth, you are the most selfless loving human being i will ever know.. you know ever since we met ever since i pulled you out of hell knowing you has changed me... because you cared i cared, i cared about you i cared about sam i cared about jack.. but i cared about the whole world because of you... you changed me, dean,” 

“why does this sound like a goodbye?”

“because it is.. i love you”

“don't do this cas” “cas..”

“goodbye dean”

dean didn't know what to do the entire time.. it was like he was frozen in to place by shock.. he was just frozen in place as castiel made this confession about love.. about loving dean. and dean didn't do anything, say anything but just stand frozen stile.. and watch as the empty took cas.. his cas again.

dean let out one more choked sob as he ran his fingers through his hair.. sam had been calling him.. something must have gone wrong, he couldn't muster up the energy to answer him.

“god..” he breathed out “i- i'm so fucking stupid” 

he didn't know what he was saying or what he was trying to stay, he just kept talking.

“cas.. cas i'm so sorry” he let out another choked sob “you didn't- you didn't give me time cas!”

he didn't realise it but he was beginning to yell now, out of frustration, anger, sadness, guilt.. he didn't know which one maybe a mix of all of them, he didn't know.

“damnit cas... if you- if you just gave me time i would've- i would've told you...”

he didn't know what he was trying to say anymore, he just knew he had to get it out, out in the open.

“fuck..” he choked out “fuck cas, i... i love you too, i fuckin' love you too cas” 

he had felt tears run down his face, he hadn't realised he started crying again. 

“god.. i love you so much.. but you- you didn't give me time.. if you gave me time i would've told you that.. god cas you- you can't just say something like that and then leave me” 

he knew cas didn't go willingly.. cas had got taken by the empty just to save dean.. he just wasn't ready for all of this.. he's lost his angel before, but this- this was different he's gotten cas back every damn time, but this time cas isn't coming back.. 

dean let out another choked sob has he slammed his hand down onto the hard floor.

“damnit cas.. you left me again, and i can't- can't get you back this time.. fuck cas- i need you, i need you here with me” 

his phone rang again and dean jump at the sound, he saw that it was sam calling again, he clicked the answer button and put the phone to his ear.

“sam?”

“dean!” sam sighed in relief “thank god”

“sammy? what happened” 

“it was chuck dean..” he paused as though he was still processing what had happened “he got everyone.. it's- it's just us de” 

“i'll be on my way okay?”

“hurry dean” sam, said worriedly 

“i'll be there”

dean ended the call and stuffed the phone back into his jacket pocket. 

he stood up and almost fell back down his legs were weak from just sitting there, he regained his balance, as he made his way out of the bunker and to baby.

he got into baby and just sat there for a moment staring at his hands on the wheel. dean shook out of it sigh, starting the engine and driving off to sam and jacks location.

**Author's Note:**

> you're gonna have to wait for the next chapter cause i don't know when i'll be done


End file.
